Let’s go through a mental exercise together: Think back to exactly 3 months ago.
I want you to list everything you purchased on Amazon – Go!
I’ll go first! Umm, I bought a bulk package of body wash… wait, that was last month.
Oh, I know! A cell phone case, wait… crap, that was also last month. Hmmm… what else.
I always smell like a fresh ocean breeze 🙂
(Suave Marketing Department – please contact me for sponsorship opportunities.)
But the bigger question is do we really need to buy all these random “things” if you can’t even remember what you bought? Is having every single hot new item really necessary?
Shift the Paradigm
If your recall is anything like mine, you probably can barely remember what you ate yesterday for lunch, let alone your purchase history for the last year.
My point is, and you’ve probably heard this before, that material possessions do not make you happy; especially, if you can’t even remember most of them! There are more than a few people I know that definitely live to get the dopamine hit for something they purchase. But it’s always short lived and they move onto the next purchase. These individuals treat every day as Christmas where the UPS guy becomes their personal Santa.
It’s kind of sad in a way and, honestly, cheapens the whole gift model. Nothing is really that special if you are constantly receiving things. People constantly jump to buy the next hot thing. We have to break free of the cycle of constantly buying. We have to try and not substitute things for missing holes in our lives. Instead, we should fill our lives with something more meaningful.
I’m not one of those people that thinks you shouldn’t have any possessions. I think there is a place for material necessities, but the thing is, the item should be necessary. On the other side of the coin, there’s a lot of surplus and excess, when really all that’s needed is a more conscious approach to acquiring goods.
If you take a step back and look at the rampant consumerism around us, you’ll see a lot of it is superfluous. There is a proliferation of unnecessary purchasing. People feel compelled to buy, buy, buy. It’s really an addiction.
Society and modern marketing constantly bombard you to get the latest this new gadget because then you’ll be finally happy. Don’t you want to keep up with your peers and get that nice luxury watch?
Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate quality products that bring enjoyment. I have loads of fun using my kayak and skis, for example. I find spending on something to help create experiences is the “stuff” that really makes you happy.
Having a fun filled day travelling or hanging out with friends is what really brings me joy and it doesn’t cost much! I try to prioritize my spending to make moments like these happen more, rather than spend on all the ancillary unmemorable paraphernalia that most people purchase and then promptly forget about every day.
Personally, I intentionally spend a good amount of money every year on travel. I love travelling and I can tell you every vacation I’ve been on. The vacations are special and unique, so I’m able to recall many of the details, memorable sites, stories, and experiences from each one.
If you haven’t found what you love in life, keep searching! Try to find what brings you happiness and cut out the excess junk to focus your efforts on bringing more joy into your life. If you make a conscious choice to prioritize the important things in life, you’ll find unlimited happiness.
“Stuff” that Sparks Joy
A few years ago, I was amongst friends at their new house admiring their very practical, yet simple décor and furnishings. Their new place kind of shocked me, because in the past, they had a tendency to hoard. So, of course, I very politely asked them how they got rid of all their sh*t. (I can be kind of blunt like that.)
What was the secret key to becoming more of a minimalist? I just didn’t have any framework to get rid of my junk, because hell, I spent good money on this stuff and I wasn’t going to just throw it away. Plus, I might find a use for it eventually…
At their recommendation, I read Marie Kondo’s book – The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up. The main take away was to ask yourself if your possessions sparked joy when you touched them. If it didn’t, you can thank it for its service and let it go. If it still brings you joy, then you keep it.
Sounds like a lot of frou-frou mumbo jumbo, but it actually worked for me. When I tried to approach my clutter through conventional ways (i.e. through cost justification or potential use in the future), I inevitably kept the item.
But, when I just asked whether the item made me happy, I had a better deterministic method to discard or keep the item in question. I think this works because deep down humans still rely on their emotions for a lot of their decisions, but I’m no psychologist.
Sure enough, I got through a decent portion of my stuff and realized that I didn’t use most of the things that didn’t ‘spark joy’. After it was all said and told, I donated several bins of stuff. I appreciated my newly decluttered living space and felt pleasure in only having things that I actually used. It felt good!
We can even take it one step further, so you don’t have to go through getting rid of unwanted things. From the beginning, DO NOT buy something you are not in love with. I’ve bought shirts in the past, only to then realize that they just sat in my dresser, only worn once or twice. Now, I only make a purchase if it’s necessary. It’s and intentional decision and not an off-hand impulse buy.
Why not just have items that “Spark Joy” all throughout the entire product’s life-cycle? What I mean by that is to use the “Spark Joy” process from the beginning (when purchasing) all the way through to the end of the functioning life of the item.
For example, say you tore a huge hole in your winter coat (nothing a sewing machine could fix!), so you need another. Spend some time researching and actually go to the store to try the coat on. Actually, take pride in how it looks on you in the mirror. Then, only purchase if you love the coat.
Heck, even better, DO NOT actually purchase it and leave. See if you “miss” it after a few days. And if you do, THEN go back and buy it.
While in your possession, treat the coat with respect and it will last years. When the coat is simply no longer usable, try and use sustainable methods of recycling to “send it off”.
If you take care of your belongings, they will bring lasting “joy” and many years of faithful use.
Societal Mindset Change
Here in the good ol’ US of A, we buy everything, anytime we can, whenever we can. We are now a culture that expects a new product every day in the mail. We buy something to solve a problem instead of maybe finding a solution with the stuff we already have around the house. We’ll use the product once, then misplace it, or never use it again. We have multiples of the same gadget.
We have turned into a disposable nation. And we have a lot of crap. Hoarding has become a diagnosable disease. The average American creates 1,704 pounds of garbage every year. A lot of that goes into landfills or the ocean; where waste is not broken down sustainably. Plastics and pollution are harming all manner of lifeforms. Something has to be done differently when 8 billion people are producing garbage at scale, so we’re not swimming in trash.
We like our stuff. If there’s a hot new tech gadget, well, guess what, it’s going to be under most trees at Christmas. Most of these things are fads that come and go – Fitbits, DVDs, BB-8 droids, Wii…and the list can go on forever. Yes, we buy these things, hell everyone buys these things, they might serve a purpose for a while, then they become dust collectors. Do you really need 27 pairs of shoes or 14 purses?
We have turned into a throw-away culture. We need a complete cultural mindset shift, where NOT buying something is valued over purchasing random junk.
There are other ways we can strive to conserve and share to prevent needless purchases. We need to think outside the box a little bit if we want to be more conscious since our collective habits not only affect us but the planet as a whole. The refuse of humanity can be seen in all corners of the Earth.
Let’s go back to our roots. Can we borrow something from our neighbor? Why not share a lawn mower with your friend down the road? Why buy a car when you live in the city and use it twice a month? Can you use public transportation, rent a car, or bike instead? Let’s have a friends group dinner once a week! Is there a way we can utilize the sharing economy more?
These are just some suggestions. There are a ton of people out there every day using more creative and innovative ways to help society. We should try to become more sustainable and practice mindful spending habits. The key is to challenge yourself to think creatively. Dare yourself to go a whole month without buying ANY discretionary purchases.
In the End
As morbid as it sounds, when you finally do depart this world… most of your stuff will either be tossed out, donated, or sold. Only valuable or memorable things will be kept by your friends and family. If you have tons of little trinkets or random knick-knacks around your house, I can guarantee you, most of your family will not want all that “junk”. They might mean something to you, but nothing to someone else. The best-case scenario is someone else finds value in your stuff and it goes to a new home. So at least someone is taking it off your family’s hands and it’s not going to sit in a landfill for 10,000 years.
The “deathbed” lens really shows us what’s important in life. We should be spending time with friends and family, going on epic adventures, or having awesome experiences. That’s what you’ll remember. That’s taking the big picture view in life. You’re not going to care that all your furniture is in style or that you have 31 ties – one for every day of the month when you eventually go. No, you’re going to care about the moments that made your heart feel full.
Challenge yourself – next time you have a discretionary purchase you’re contemplating, use the 72-hour rule to sleep on it for 3 days and mull it over. If you still really, really want it, then go for it. But, just make sure it something that will be used and appreciated, not discarded.
Be intentional with your purchases, because:
Recommended Reading
For most, the time you dedicate at your 9 to 5 is directly correlated with the money you make. In essence, you are trading your only non-renewable resource, time, for money and, indirectly, the “stuff” you buy. That car you just purchased; you spent half a year working for it. Reading Vicki Robin’s Your Money or Your Life was really an eye opening mindset change for me. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED
Get your copy at Amazon today – It’s Your Life!
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